Hats off

Did you know that a jiffy bag used to mail out pre-configured Blackberries is the perfect size to fit round a second line support technician’s head? Neither did the technician. Lets say we both found out at the same time, but he was more surprised than I that testing was in progress.

Niiiiice hat. One careful owner, only worn for 3.2 seconds. You’d buy that for a dollar.

Whether you are playing Warhammer or bungee jumping out of a helicopter, headgear is important though in Warhammer you are less likely to bounce back into rotor blades unless you’re a dwarf. Headgear tells people what you are all about and protects you in many cunning ways. For instance, forward facing slits make it harder to get poked in the eyes while providing the kind of awesome tunnel vision enjoyed by late night DJs. Totally encasing the side of your head means you don’t have to hear when people are saying something nasty about you and more importantly, stops flanking manouevers with sharp sticks from turning your head into a spit roast.

So what’s headgear in Warhammer all about. It would appear to be all about horns, spikes and curly pointy bits of no obvious function but looks threatening and intimidating. A track record of what your toon has been up to in the past.

Wouldn’t it be nice if WAR headgear had a customisable slot that made the various stuff hanging off it actually do something. Wouldn’t it be nice if the headgear really was a track record of what you’d killed, customised with freaky looks depending on trophies culled from mobs in the game world or even other players. Wouldn’t it be awesome if the trophies empowered the wearer with an ability.

Tanks would benefit from a big horn pointing forward when they charge. It could serve both to gore the enemy and as a handy coat-hook after battle. Or perhaps have two horns which give an actual fighting move, and can double as handlebars when a guildmate can’t find their mount.

Casters could have a variety of things that do funky spells. Note I’m looking at something a bit different from talismans. I’m looking for things that have an effect – an actual ability. So perhaps summoning a demon that runs around leaving a fire trail that forms a pentagram. If it completes then Something Nasty(TM) happens if it isn’t killed beforehand. It could be a small meteor strike or a TV set that only shows chat shows (massive negative effect on enemy morale gain).

And of course you get to customise your hat a little bit. For a Magus that might mean something sticking out of your head that ISN’T a horn. A TV aerial might not be appropriate but some kind of rune, ruff or tentacle or… ok I admit defeat on this one. Another type of horn. Just some kind of trophy.

Goblins already have some of the wierdest and most wonderful headgear in the game. Stick a nurgling on their head and let the nurgling actually do something – tongue lashing or bursting pimples over enemies, its all good. Killing particular nurglings might offer a different ability.

I think most people would agree that just putting paper bags on the heads of dwarves would be sufficient and increase their general aesthetic value. There’s a REASON these guys stay in tunnels and hang around in the dark. Any species that is impossible to distinguish when they are standing on their hands or feet should be culled fast.

Why headgear and not some other part of the armour?

In a crowd whether it be fighting or a line of tanks queing up to repair a keep door, headgear is the most obviously defining attribute of a character. The WAR toon heads and helmets are nice, but could use a bit of a <cough> toon-up.

It has been suggested elsewhere that people are allowed to equip the Tome of Knowledge reward cloaks into a trophy slot so that you get to keep the stats on your hard earned cloak but make it look like something funky and unique from the WAR world. It might be nice to also allow something similar for helmets.

We could have Ascot, WAR style. Now that could be a hoot.


1 Response to “Hats off”

  1. 1 Roo Stercogburn
    April 4, 2009 at 16:42

    Slightly ironic after this blog entry that today we push all the way through to Altdorf and on the second fort I win a massive loot bag from which I get…

    … a hat. Conqueror. With horns and what looks like a quiff. I wish I’d thought faster on my feet once I saw it to say Elvis style “Thank you, thank you very much. Uh huh huh.”

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